One person does not get to determine a winner. Proper adjudication of a motion requires two teams of three and a jury with keypads in their armrests.

But, regarding the larger point. What I do not have within easy reach is one of the several rejection letters I’ve received from agents/publishers telling me to read books like Mr. King’s in order to make my writing publishable.

There, I’ve said it. I’m embittered by rejection!

But I still think that this kind of thinking is homogenizing the arts.

The original sentence, from gut to quill, read:

“It is sort of cute, but also rather worthless, as there are too many tags on too small a space, and I don’t know how to make the stupid thing bigger.”

Your revised and “improved” sentence read:

“I like its dynamic nature, but too many tags on too small a space render the gadget functionally useless, and I can’t figure out how to make it bigger.”

(You then “improved” this further to:

“I like its dynamic nature, but too many tags on too small a space render the gadget useless, and I can’t figure out how to make it bigger.”)

Your original sentence wins hands down!!

I just opened a random page of The Stand, which happened to be within reach on my little desk here, and on this page (p. 743) I read the following:

In the extremity of his joy, Leo’s carefully won-back vocabulary had deserted him, …

He could only hoot loudly and enthusiastically.

…and he saw that he was applauding as frantically as the rest.

… a family of barnswallows that had taken up residence in this fine and private place after the plague struck now flew about crazily, …

… and Stu muttered, “Goddam thing,” which was clearly picked up and broadcast.

He cleared his throat, feedback whined briefly, and he took a wary step back from the mike.

The page is small-print, roughly 400 words, and I found seven adverbs. Assuming I missed a few, let’s say the page contains 12 adverbs. Would be interesting to perform a scientific adverb count in Stephen King’s ouvre to see how many he uses compared to other authors.

So I say, imploringly, make laughingly, lovingly, playfully, nauseatingly, poetically, atrociously, slyly, amusingly, perniciously joyful use of adverbs. Really.

My biggest pet peeve is (AAARGH!!!) the word “be” in all its bromidic incarnations, particularly the pesky “It is…” at the beginning of a sentence or clause. Please don’t remind me how many times I used it in this post. Talking about committing suicide. Having used “is” and “was” multiple times and not being able to come up with snappy replacements ranks among my personal top causes for suicidal ideation.

Yes, I believe the rotating tag cloud plugin is available on WP.org only. It is sort of cute, but also rather worthless, as there are too many tags on too small a space, and I don’t know how to make the stupid thing bigger.

OK. Let’s try the previous sentence without the wearisome “it is” and “there are”:

I like its dynamic nature, but too many tags on too small a space render the gadget functionally useless, and I can’t figure out how to make it bigger.

I suppose we can kill the “functionally,” as the word useless sufficiently implies a lack of functionality. Actually, not sufficiently implies, but simply implies. Now let’s cut the “actually” and the “simply”: Not sufficiently implies, but implies.

Much better–I’m learning, Mr. King!

And yes, I’m a compulsive self-editor. The good news is that after a few dozen nips and tucks and rewrites applied over several weeks, I often reach a point where I actually like the way a paragraph flows.

You’re poking fun at somebody for something in such a way that your love for the thing becomes even clearer.

As it happens, I was not even aware of King’s essay, but I’ve also gone through a phase when I avoided ALL passive tenses and ALL adverbs. I stopped when I realized that I had overdone it, and that my writing was bad.

I had a few other phases. At one point, I refused to start an article with a small fill word such as “a” or “the” or “in”. I looked for verbs (action!) in the gerund instead. That too soon got rather silly and stupid.

BTW, whew, what a great spinning tag cloud over on the right.

Is that only available on WordPress.org?

That said, my eyes keep wandering over there, and away from your post….

are you self-editing? my email alerts are different than your posts.

to take your own life is an extension of mental illness, since we are hardwired to survive at all cost. suicide FOLLOWS extreme, overwhelming pain. period. yes the meds are often far worse than the disease.

not all people in pain commit suicide, it’s dependent on a persons “threshold” for pain. it’s a desperate act by desperate people who have given up any hope of a life free of pain.

And I didn’t “shred” Stephen King’s advice. The guy is a phenomenal writer, and his book abounds with valuable suggestions. I merely picked on a minor incongruity. After all, the hapless author had just been hit by a motor vehicle. The process of learning to walk again often distracts from keeping tabs on one’s adverbs. Besides, no writer follows their own advice to a T.

Not much has changed since Biblical times. One still needs a snake to reproduce. Sort of.